Who's On-Line Now?

Tuesday 4 May 2010

Descending Again

I hate to admit it, but over the last couple of months I have been gradually descending into another depressive slump. Today I am feeling really really low. I woke at around 09:00 and my first thought was that I had absolutely nothing to get out of bed for.
I am back to work tonight at 19:00, but other than that there is absolutely no reason for me to get out from underneath my duvet. I don't even think I can be bothered to go to the gym this afternoon, though I will probably force myself (if I can manage to get myself dressed in time).
Other than the usual bio-chemical reasons for my depression, I am feeling low because my life consists of spending time on my own ALL the time. I have no one to do the "usual" things with, like shopping, going to the cinema, hanging out, all I ever do is sit in my room on my own or go to the pub and drink (sometimes that is on my own too!). It is so fucking tedious.
I know that I need a hobby or something, but I have no idea what I could do, especially as in order to do it I would, initially at least, have to start once again all on my own.
People tell me that I need to get away on holiday (I've not been abroad for about 17 years), but what fun is that on your own? I know I've done it before, albeit in this country. I don't really need a holiday, all I need is good company.

I know what I need, but it isn't always easy to get what you need:

New Friends. New Job. New Hobbies. New Home.

Sounds simple when you write it down doesn't it?

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