I'm Back

I got back from Essex about 2 hours ago and I am really tired. I had a fantastic weekend though and so pleased that everything seemed to go to plan (apart from a few very minor things, like forgotten earrings and a garter, and a moaning caterer!). I had such a good time which, considering I was dreading the whole thing, because of the speech I had to make.
I had a lay in on Friday, getting up at 09:00 and made my way to Basildon in Essex at around midday. Maxine, my sister who was getting married, picked me up at the train station and we went back to her home. That evening after dinner we went to the hall where the evening party was due to take place and set up as much of the decorations that we could. We couldn't do everything as there was a jazzercise class due to take place in the hall on the Saturday morning and so we couldn't put the tables out before then.
On the Saturday we went back to the hall first thing in the morning (06:00) and took all the food to put in the kitchen. When we left the jazzersize class arrived and we were really quite annoyed that there were only five people in the class. They had adamantly refused to cancel the class when Maxine asked them to, as it was really inconvenient for us to have to wait so long to set up the hall for the wedding.
When we went back to Maxine's to get changed it was slightly like organised chaos, with so many people getting changed with only one bathroom (my brother, sister-in-law, Jacquie, and niece, Abigail, were also there along with my sister, her fiance, his daughter, Stacy, my niece, Mikala, and 2 great nieces, Courtney and Keleigh, oh and the two dogs, Abby and Frank, which needed attention every five minutes.
Everyone was just about ready by the time the limo arrived and I mean just about. Maxine looked amazing in her red dress with cream swirls around the lower left side. The bridesmaids looked really pretty, especially Courtney, my great-niece, who, along with a matching dress also had angel wings on her back (well she is only 14 months old). And, even if I do say so myself, the groom [Lee], best man [Arron] and I looked great in our matching three-piece suits (I was giving my sister away, as my dad died when we were kids and Kevin, my older brother gave my other sister away at her wedding 18 years ago).
The car was a hummer-limo and, although I think that they are tacky for hen nights and parties, I think it was perfect for taking the main party to the wedding. I normally hate wine, but thought I best have some of the wine provided in the limo for good luck toasts, and was surprised that the white wine they had was really nice (I can't remember what it was called though). It was fun on the journey to the registry office, and we were so pleased that the day was so beautiful and really warm, despite being a really wet and windy August otherwise. I said to my sister that maybe it was organised by two people who couldn't be there, meaning my mum and dad, which started her and then me, and almost everyone else in the limo, off crying. It hadn't been my intention.
We had a few photos when we emerged from the car before all the guests arrived. The service was straight forward and fun, Courtney was bored and made herself known to everyone, but in a hilarious way. Everyone was enchanted. Afterwards we had photos taken on the small green across the road. There were some amazing photos taken and I can't wait to see them.
We then got the limo back to the hall. Some friends of Maxine had set up the last few bits there and had done a great job. When all the sit-down meal guests had arrived, including one uninvited guest (not his fault!). My new brother-in-law's son, Arron, was best man and so he was in charge of ceremonies. He told everyone to help themselves to the buffet, my other sister's hubby and two of her sons raced over to the food immediately, not unexpectedly, they like their food. We were all hungry as most of us had been too busy to eat before then.
When everyone had appeared to havw eaten, Arron got everyone's attention and began his speech. He had been really nervous about it and so had had about 10 glasses of wine beforehand. He made a good job of it anyway and I was really pleased for him. I was next, as acting father-of-the-bride and I had written my speech out. I put it on the table and, although I was intending to read it out, almost word for word, I was too nervous to and so add-libbed a lot of it. I got most of what I wanted to say said, despite interruptions and heckling. I was really pleased that it seemed to go well. Here is what I had written out for my speech:

Good Afternoon Everyone,
For those of you who don't know me, I'd best introduce myself. I am Alex, Maxine's little brother, and I've been granted the honour of giving her away today.
I'm not used to public speaking, so please forgive me if I mess it up. I was really nervous about today, so I asked a mate of mine for some tips on making speeches:
He told me that he compared making speeches to making love. [*]
I was impressed with this, but a bit confused, so I asked him why.
“Because,” he said, “When I do it, I normally mess it up, it doesn't last very long, and it always feels better when I practice it at home on my own!”
Today has been wonderful so far, and it is great to see so many of Maxine and Lee's friends here today, most of whom I don't know yet. It is also great to see so many of our family gathered for the first time in quite a while.
Best of all is that both of my sisters, my brother and I are in the same place at the same time which happens very rarely.
Now, back to Maxine and Lee. Before you ask, no, it's not a shotgun wedding! Lee isn't marrying Maxine because she is pregnant! Though, going by the example of the last two years, it is very likely that Mikala could be!
No, the reason that these two oldies are getting hitched it, bizarrely, that they actually love each other. There really is no accounting for taste, eh?
I am honoured to be here though, giving Maxine's hand in marriage to Lee. He seems like a decent guy, except for the jokes! And Maxine is a very special lady.
OK! Maybe “lady” is pushing it a bit, but she has certainly grown out of the worst of her “ladette” phase.
There were a few worrying years, back in her teens, when she went off the rails a bit. But she, and we, got through it and, over time, Maxine has developed into the wonderful, caring woman that you see before you today. She has raised her daughter Mikala, who has now become a mother herself twice over, and Maxine has even followed in our big sister Lynn's footsteps and become a nursing sister herself.
Maxine is now someone to be proud of and I think that our parents would say the same were they still with us.
Maxine and Lee, thank you for inviting us to share your day (this time!!), I hope that it is a wonderful day for you both, to start a few thousand more wonderful days together.
Ladies & Gentlemen,
MAXINE & LEE

The punchline of my one joke [*] was blurted out by the groom when he shouted out "because it's really short?" but I recovered and carried on, luckily it wasn't the whole punchline so I think I got away with it, and everyone still laughed.
I made Maxine cry again with what I had said, again unintentional, and I was really pleased that it was over and that I hadn't messed it up for my sister. Throughout the evening I had a few people tell me, unprompted that I had done really well.
When the speeches were done, and I had got a gift of an engraved tankard and a box of Strongbow cider cans as a thank you, we got on with the party. It was, however, a couple of hours at least until any of the evening guests arrived, so that part of the evening was a bit dull, but, to be honest it was nice for the reprieve.
When the guests did begin to arrive the fun really started, everyone seemed to get up and dance at some point, yes, even me. I had a great time chatting to people, some I knew, some I'd forgotten that I knew, most of the ones that I did know I hadn't seen for 10 years or more. My uncle Barry and his (very) long-term girlfriend Anne were at the ceremony and the meal and I hadn't seen them for about 15 years. Late in the evening his brother, Peter, turned up with his new wife, his son, Brett, with his wife and 2 kids, whom I had never met, his sister, Marcelle, and her daughter Eden with her boyfriend, Richard [?]. I also hadn't seen any of these for over 15 years.
Also there was my other brother-in-law's niece, Lisa, who was in the year below me at school and whom I had worked with for a couple of years at Lakeside. Her boyfriend (husband?), Bobby, who had been in my year at school was there too.
And some friends of my two sisters who I hadn't seen for years were there too.
Talent-wise, there was one guy there who was really my type. He was over 6' tall, with a shaved head, possibly broken nose, and semi-muscular build and also nicely dressed. I eventually found out that he was the boyfriend of my new brother-in-law's cousin. Oh well.
The other good looking guys there were:
One guy who looked like a (short) model, who was there with his girlfriend.
The uninvited guest from the sit-down meal, who was very handsome, but didn't talk much and was far too young for me.
And Arron's best mate (and cousin, I think) Jack who was really not my type but was a nice looking guy with a really sweet personality and who was not getting too drunk as he was looking out for Arron, who was getting very drunk.
It was an amazingly successful day and I think Maxine and Lee were very happy. Lee did have a small disagreement with Arron, when Arron was trying to get him on the dance floor when Lee was having a conversation with some friends, but other than this it was perfect. I haven't been to a party for years, but this was brilliant. I had real fun messing about with my brother, sisters, nieces, nephews, step-niece and step-nephew and other assorted people. The best family event for ages.
I didn't really want to leave, but Jacquie was driving me back to Maxine's that night and so we (Kevin, Abigail, Jacquie and I) left at about 12:00. Arron, Stacy (his sister) and Jack got a taxi at the same time and arrived a little before we did. Arron was asleep by the time we got in and Jack, who is over a foot shorter than Arron, had lifted him up the stairs and onto his bed all alone.
Once again, I didn't get a good night's sleep, as the house is really hot and the dogs kept making noise with their sniffing, licking, prowling and eating. I eventually shut them in the hallway to get some sleep.

Today, I helped bring back the edible food that remained at the hall, along with all the paraphernalia. Taking it back to Maxine's we stayed there until about 15:00 when Kevin and family left to go back to Newcastle. Lynn had come over and took me back to her place for lunch before dropping me off at the train station for me to come home.
The train journey back was the most stressful part of the whole weekend. I queued for about 10 minutes while two people in front of me got tickets, missing my train in the process. When I got to the front of the queue the machine decided to stop taking cash. I walked to the other platform only to find no way to pay there either. I was advised by the platform guard to pay on the train. No one came along on the train, so I managed to save some money. The train I managed to get terminated at Barking so I got the tube from there and had to change once before getting back to Barbican. It was so nice getting home and having a shower. I felt like I could finally relax for the first time all weekend, but I don't mind as I had an amazing time. Hopefully someone will Facebook or email me with some photo's very soon. When they do I shall share them with you.

It is back to work tomorrow, for 2 day shifts and 1 night shift. I will be pleased of the rest I can get there!!